


Sudden but inevitable betrayal

by Polina_K_Viardo



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Angst, Discussion of canon rift between the characters, Humour, Interrogation with creepy sexual overtones in a dream sequence, Mid 5th season, Tons of innuendos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-10 19:10:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7001065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polina_K_Viardo/pseuds/Polina_K_Viardo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To dispel the disturbing feeling of the nightmare about Garak's sudden but inevitable betrayal Julian decides to discuss it... with Garak.</p>
<p>[18+: This is content restricted to audiences of 18 years or over.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sudden but inevitable betrayal

**Author's Note:**

> Rating M is only for having adult themes - there is no explicit content in the story. 
> 
> [18+: This is content restricted to audiences of 18 years or over. Do not read unless you are over 18.]

"The nightmare I'm seeing has worn me completely thin," Julian complained. "Another dream like this and I'll simply expire!"  
  
Garak glanced up. "You don't look that unwell, Doctor."  
  
"I guess, I shouldn't have expected anything else - after all, Nurse Jabara and I got 9.5 Gy of psychotropic radiation each," Julian continued. Garak's eyes glazed over. "That's a lot."  
  
"Ah."  
  
"The counselor promised that the nightmares would stop soon, but I'm already at the end of my rope!"  
  
"This is all very unfortunate, Doctor," the needle paused mid-air as Garak looked up at Julian, "but why exactly are you telling me this?"  
  
Julian shifted uncomfortably. But there was nothing for it, so he sighed and began. "To shake off the disturbing feeling of these nightmares," he swallowed the tight ball of trepidation, "I think I have to discuss them… with you." As expected, Garak's stare became highly dubious. Julian hastened to add, "It will be just like our literary discussions - me offering you a story conceived by a human mind and you shredding it to pieces." He looked at Garak pleadingly.  
  
Garak sighed and put down his embroidery. "Don't take it wrong, Doctor, but I think it's been almost a year since you were interested in any kind of literary discussions with me."  
  
Ouch. How inconsiderate of Garak to point that out.  
  
"Garak, I…" Julian began.  
  
"I understand." Julian's heart clenched. "I've just been wondering if I am the right person to give you the reassurance you need." Garak explained, blank expression on his face. "Perhaps, there is another reason?"  
  
Julian would resist the subject change if his current problem were not this pressing. Under Garak's polite but firm stare he gathered himself for another uncomfortable confession. "The thing is, Nurse Jabara keeps seeing a nightmare about the Occupation. While I," he held Garak's gaze, "while I keep dreaming about you, Garak."  
  
Garak's eye ridges flew high in astonishment. But before long his expression became the one of an earnest concern. Leaning closer to Julian, he asked, his voice low and serious, "Tell me the truth, Doctor," he looked right into Julian's eyes, "was I really that bad at it?"  
  
If Julian had been holding something, he would have dropped it. "Not that kind of dreams! God!" He had to cover his face behind his hands - he cringed so hard.  
  
When he looked up, Garak smiled innocently, amusement clear in his eyes. It was exactly the expression that Julian had been missing so much.  
  
"Oh well." Garak sighed and shook his head ruefully as if Julian was the one terribly inconsiderate here, "We can't leave you at the mercy of these awful nightmares, can we?"  
  
Julian only smiled gratefully.  
  
***  
  
Julian hadn't seen his Cardassian friend for a while; he deliberately distanced himself even before Garak's stunt during Odo's trial. Yet, even Julian couldn't fail to notice that Garak was coming down with something. Hacking Odo's surveillance feed of Garak's quarters started to seem more and more tempting. Thankfully, it turned out to be unnecessary as Garak approached him first. Clearly discomfited and embarrassed, Garak asked Julian to do the checkup in Garak's rooms after the end of the shift. Julian agreed instantly - considering how much Garak valued his privacy, it was a small concession.  
  
"Thank you for indulging me, Doctor." Garak's voice was solemn with a hint of apology. "I know you a very busy man."  
  
"Don't worry about it." Julian placed his tricoder and medical kit on the chair. "Shall we?"  
  
Instead of complying Garak pushed a steaming cup of tea to Julian. "In a moment. I would be unforgivably lax in my duties as a host if after inviting you here I didn't even offer you a cup of Tarkalean."  
  
Julian stared at the cup, unsure - he would rather get straight to the medical problem. But if it calmed Garak, who looked unusually agitated, Julian could play along.  
  
Julian sat at the table and sipped his tea. Garak, clearly pacified, hid his smile behind the rim of his own cup. "Much obliged, Doctor."  
  
The next moment the cup slipped from Julian's nerveless fingers. The room pummeled into tunnel vision while he struggled to take a breath. He tried to punch his comm but Garak tore it away and carefully placed on the dry part of the table. Julian's palms pressed on the wet surface as he tried to lift himself, the burn of the spilled tea barely registering. Julian's hands scrambled on the sticky surface until Garak caught them to wrench behind Julian's back.  
  
Julian couldn't tell what was used to fasten his wrists together.  
  
***  
  
"Not that kind of dream, you said?"  
  
"Garak!" Julian hissed. Whatever capacity for tact Garak had, it wasn't in evidence tonight.  
  
"Doctor, please, don't take offense." Garak urged him. He put a comforting hand on Julian's arm, his face full of sincere worry. "You must believe me, Doctor," he implored Julian, "when I say that I would never use tea to incapacitate you."  
  
"Garak!" Julian jerked his hand away.  
  
"You said it yourself - it gets everywhere." Garak looked entirely too pleased with himself.  
  
"And what would you have done?" Julian challenged and crossed his hands.     
  
Garak smiled. "There are more efficient ways to unobtrusively dose a target with a substance," he replied while Julian stared at him skeptically. "Even a simple tailor like me knows it."  
  
"Really?" The word dripped with acid but judging by the spark of delight in Garak's eyes, Garak enjoyed it. He did enjoy the weirdest things.  
  
"For example, I could do this…"  
  
"Ow!" Julian jumped on his seat and a moment later Garak showed him an embroidery needle. Julian rubbed the offended leg.  
  
Another self-pleased smile flickered on Garak's face before he grew serious. "It must grate on your nerves, Doctor, that these dream complications always happen to you. Like that time with…"  
  
"Altovar, yes." Julian sighed and fiddled with his cup.  
  
"Am I again in the role of the villain?" Garak asked, a note of genuine compassion in his voice.  
  
Julian smiled sadly. "You'll need to listen till the end to know it."  
  
"How peculiar! But before we continue, are you sure that the Replimat is the right place to discuss this?"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
***  
  
Julian overbalanced his chair, the only act of defiance left. It didn't deter Garak much - he just grabbed Julian under his arms and dragged him to the wall. Detached, Julian watched as his own legs dangled over the carpet. Was the carpet here always this shade of green? He shook his head but it didn't help him to focus. He needed to focus!  
  
Garak left him leaning on the wall and brought back the tricorder.  
  
"Now, that's unusual," he muttered studying Julian's readings. He didn't know that Julian was an augment, then.  
  
"Oh well, that will have to do…" Garak crouched near Julian and critically looked him over. Then Garak slapped him, and it finally managed to clear Julian's head.  
  
"What…" Julian creaked but Garak put his finger to Julian's lips. Julian would scream anyway if his voice were not that weak or the walls that thick.  
  
"Do you know what day it is, Doctor?" Garak asked in a casual manner.  
  
Compulsion to answer twisted Julian's insides. With growing terror he realized that Garak dosed him with a truth serum. Julian jerked trying to get away, panicked; Garak silently watched until Julian exhausted himself. "What day it is?" Garak repeated unrelenting.  
  
"Stardate… 2031.87," Julian whispered, defeated. Afraid.  
  
Garak nodded as if satisfied. "What is your name?"  
  
"Julian… Bashir."  
  
"What is the name of the station we are on?"  
  
"Deep Space… Nine."  
  
"Do you have a secret you keep from everyone on the station?" Garak's voice was the same, measured and unhurried - a professional performing a routine. He was. "Do you?"  
  
"Yes!" Julian cried out, feeling as if the confession was torn out of his very soul.  
  
"I'm not asking you what it is. But I need you to tell me the code of manual medical override."  
  
Julian's world was crumbling. He couldn't move, dizzy and disoriented, while unknown chemical agent collided with his augmented cells. And it was Garak who did it to him, who grabbed Julian's most precious secret and threatened to drag it to the light unless Julian betrayed all he stood for.  
  
The pain of the betrayal was excruciating.  
  
It gave him power to resist.  
  
"No."  
  
Garak sighed. "That's commendable sentiment, Doctor. Now. Tell me the code."  
  
Julian bit his own lip. Garak caught his chin and gently rubbed the blood away. "None of it. Stop."  
  
Julian jerked away but Garak grabbed him by his hairs and pulled his head back. Reflexive gasp opened Julian's mouth. "I'm sorry, my dear," Garak whispered in his ear, "but we've exhausted all the time we had for games." He ran his other hand up Julian's leg until it rested on Julian's thigh. Julian shuddered.  
  
"So much time… You've grown so much, Julian," he continued in a low voice. "I wish I could keep you but that would be an indulgence I can't afford. Now. Tell me the code."  
  
And Julian did.  
  
***  
  
"I think, Doctor," Garak looked at Julian shrewdly, "that you left something out."  
  
"Why would I do that?" Julian frowned. He left all of it out, naturally.  
  
"Because I can't believe that your subconscious would make a villain so… benign."  
  
"Benign?" Julian spluttered. "That dream-Garak used the code to attack Commander Sisko in his quarters! And as I was unable to help... "  
  
"Come now, Doctor, be frank." Garak fixed him with a stare. "I must have done something else for these dreams to be so disturbing. Shall I guess?"  
  
Julian tensed. "I told you all there was to it," he feigned annoyance, "and I find it highly offensive…"  
  
"Did I," Garak cut in, "rape you?"  
  
"What? No!"  
  
"Did I make you confess something?"  
  
Julian's blood stood in his veins. "No!"  
  
Garak lent back on his chair in apparent satisfaction. "So sexual assault it is. You almost made me think for a moment here, Doctor, that you do have something to hide." Garak's pose was relaxed but his eyes watched Julian intently, unblinking, stripping him bare.  
  
Julian jumped to his feet ready to do he knew not what, fight or flight response kicking in.  
  
"Sit down, Doctor." Garak asked, gently tagging Julian by his wrist.  
  
Reluctantly, Julian complied.  
  
"I'm sorry," Garak said softly. "I didn't want to upset you further. But the only way to break the hold of those dreams on you," he implored Julian, "is to bring all those unsavory details to the light. Rest assured, I would never hold the content of your dreams against you." Julian was not so sure about that. "Doesn't your species have a saying that one is only as sick as one's secrets?"  
  
The shock of hearing it from Garak jerked Julian out of his panic. Unfortunately, Garak was right -Julian needed to get at least a part of it out.  
  
Gathering himself, he began, "Well, there was something that made my skin crawl…"  
  
***  
  
"…And then Mr. Worf interrupted your attempt at Commander's life. You fled using Dominion transporter technology." Julian concluded, relieved that the scary part was over.  
  
"Hmm. Sounds trifle inefficient if you don't mind me saying so."  
  
"That's because nothing is as it seems." Julian smiled, pleased, while Garak heaved a long-suffering sigh.  
  
"How could I forget that you always assume me to be more devious than I am."  
  
"No, my plain, simple Mr. Garak," Julian pointed an accusing finger at him. "You are always more devious than I assume."  
  
Garak's lips tightened. "I'll write off this flight of fancy as a result of all the stress you've been under recently, Doctor."  
  
"Do you want to know what's really happened? After you disappeared I decided to check recordings of the video feed of your rooms. And I discovered…"  
  
"Don't tell me I was exchanged by the Founders."  
  
"Better - I was." Another skeptical expression graced Garak's face. "A Founder impersonating me injected you with the same mix of paralytic and truth serum and interrogated you! Just a few weeks before your attack."  
  
Garak looked surprised. "I wonder what kind of secrets your subconscious attributed to me…"  
  
Julian fidgeted. "Actually, the feed didn't have the audio channel."  
  
"Very clever of your subconscious, Doctor!"  
  
Julian refused to squirm. "Then you managed to shot the Founder, took their transporter device and staged the rest."  
  
"And my objective was…?"  
  
"To infiltrate Founders pretending to be one of them. Or, at least, get close enough to their home world to blow it up. Devious enough?"  
  
"Oh, please. I would gladly disabuse you of the notion that this plan was in any way brilliant, but first, tell me, did I succeed?"  
  
"No, you failed," Garak rolled his eyes, "and after the war ended you were freed from Dominion prison camp. We met and reconciled."  
  
"How generous of the dream-you." Garak observed with a note of disbelief.  
  
Julian shrugged. "For us, humans, a path to peace lies through forgiveness."  
  
"I'm sure. But let us finally begin with the dissecting." Garak's smile made Julian gulp. "Quite apart from the fact that there are lots of different ways to prove my loyalty to the Founders that don't include molesting you," Julian cringed, "or attacking Commander, surely you don't think that the former Obsidian Order operative whose your dream-Garak supposedly is," Julian rolled his eyes at the disclaimer, "needs restraints or, indeed, sexual assault to make someone feel exposed and vulnerable?" Garak asked casually cutting the steak on his plate. Then he glanced at Julian. "Don't look so alarmed, Doctor.  
  
"Really, I would never conceive a ridiculous plan like this - to pretend to be a Founder! - and even if I did I would go about it completely differently."  
  
"So you're saying it's entirely implausible?" Julian asked hopefully. He needed that last reassurance.  
  
"Why, of course, but there were some features of interest." He dabbed at his mouth with a napkin before continuing. "For example, I'm pleasantly surprised, no - delighted! - by the deviousness of your idea to equip my quarters with a video surveillance." Garak smiled suggestively. For Julian's frazzled nerves it was too much. He had enough embarrassment for one day - it was a time to strike back!  
  
"Tell me, Garak," Julian began affecting Garak's earnest tone of before, "have you been saving up the innuendos intended for the missed lunches just so that you could unleash them all on me today?"  
  
Garak was speechless for a moment. Then his face broke into an impressed smile. "Why, Doctor, in truth, you've grown so much!"  
  
Julian spluttered and stared at him. Did Garak have no shame? At all?  
  
"And to get all the innuendos out of the way - there were two more credible details in your dream."  
  
"Which are?" Surely, there were only so many times a man could be humiliated one day?  
  
"I do know how to bound someone effectively," Garak confessed, "though why your subconscious guessed at it - is beyond me. Perhaps, you think it's connected with my former profession?" Garak smiled innocently.  
  
Julian stared at him in disbelief. Did he just admitted not one - but two facts?  
  
Avidly watching Julian's reaction, Garak concluded, "After all, gardening gives one those skills."  
  
With a herculean effort Julian didn't swallow the bait.  
  
"And the last detail? Please, don't hold back on my account, Garak," Julian drawled caustically. "I can't deprive you of the pleasure of watching me squirm."  
  
Garak's face lit up with amusement just as Julian realized what he'd said. He almost jumped from his chair in his haste to shout, "Don't even think about it!"  
  
Several other patrons looked at the commotion, while Garak laughed quietly. Then he shook his head fondly. "Forgive me, my dear, but you did make my day today. I'm so glad to discover," he said seriously, "that deep inside you know that should I have a tactical advantage, I would use it even if it meant betraying you and everybody else on this station."  
  
Julian clenched his fists, staring hard at the table.  
  
"You've seen me do it once already."  
  
Julian hit the table and the plates jumped on it. Garak didn't even flinch. "Yes! And that's just the thing, Garak," Julian said, his voice almost a hiss, "that is exactly why the dream is so disturbing. Can't you see what's really going on in there? Despite the caution I'm helpless to prevent your betrayal, freed from the responsibility. And then your betrayal is no betrayal at all and I am able to forgive you." Garak listened silently, his face devoid of any emotions. "That's what I dream about and it's all your fault."  
  
The accusing words rang in the air. Julian's hard stare had to be unforgiving but Garak held it calmly. "That's right," he said, brutally honest at last. "Before I'm reinstated on Cardassia, I will betray you," he uttered, "and all the people here many, many times over. And I'm exceedingly glad that you figured it out even before you saw the proof for yourself."  
  
"Don't say that." Julian whispered. "Say that it's a lie like many others. A clever mask to protect yourself. That you only say it to make me feel better. Because," Julian had to claw it out of the deepest corner of himself but he had to, "because it breaks my heart, Elim." Garak flinched. "Why doesn't it break yours?"  
  
Silence lasted for so long, Julian despaired to get the answer. He stared at the remains of his lunch dejectedly. What did he expect?  
  
Suddenly, Garak's voice cut the silence. "Tell me, if you were asked what quality you and I shared, what would you answer?" Julian looked up, thrown by the non-sequitur. "Would you not say it is that we never know when to quit?"  
  
Before Julian could think that through, Garak continued, "All this doom and gloom is bad for your health, Doctor. You're strong and resilient," he said intently as if he was making a point about some Cardassian novel that he desperately wanted Julian to understand, "I'm convinced that you'll survive through it all. So I ask you, Julian," he echoed, "do not betray that quality - do not give up hope."  
  
Julian could only take that in.  
  
"And now, let's dispel the remaining parts of this nightmare of yours," Garak said with his usual flare, leading them back to the firm ground. The noise of the Replimat hit Julian like a wave, breaking the stillness of the moments before. He mentally shook himself.  
  
"To be honest," Julian admitted, "you're taking this all surprisingly well."  
  
"Ah!" Garak exclaimed, more sincere smile on his face. "And why shouldn't I? Such an interesting insight into your inner psyche! A lot more entertaining than that spy-holonovel was." Julian marveled at the ease with which Garak could annoy him. Really, it was uncanny. "What I am surprised at is why dream-me was so lax as to leave you without getting any compromising information first. Very short-sighted of him."  
  
"Whatever for?" Julian asked innocently. If they were back to playing games Julian was not going to lose. "No, let me guess - to use as a leverage?" Time to strike at the 'doom and gloom' at Garak's expense. "Leverage for medical overrides or, perhaps," Julian went for the kill, "sexual favors?"  
  
Garak didn't even spluttered. What was worse - he looked delighted. "Really, Doctor, do you think I need a leverage to find bed partners?"  
  
Julian refused to back up. "Surely being a Cardassian on a Bajoran station, it's not easy to… make friends?"  
  
"Oh my!" Garak covered his mouth with his hand in a pretended shock. Then he looked at Julian, that glaringly fake pitiful expression on his face. "My dear," he began, "I'm so sorry to be the one to break it to you like that, but someone has to." Julian held his breath. "People don't need to be friends to have intercourse."  
  
"Garak, you…!" Julian barely resisted giving an infuriating lizard a shove.  
  
Garak tutted. "No wonder Lt. Dax refused you. To corrupt such innocence! Why, it would be like molesting a child!"  
  
Julian ground his teeth, mortified despite his best efforts and battling irresistible impulse to strangle Garak where he sat.  
  
"Do go on embarrassing me!" he hissed instead.  
  
"Ah, Doctor, but you manage to do this all on your own." Garak smiled unrepentant.  
  
"And don't think I bought that comment about bondage expertise! You'd never reveal a personal detail like that."  
  
Garak shrugged and then added in a lower voice, "I think, Doctor, that out of the two of us it was you who was positively indecent," he smiled predatorily, "what with exposing your inner psyche and all."  
  
Julian didn't even have words anymore.  
  
"We could dissect your dream some more, Doctor, but I'm afraid we've exhausted all the time we had for games." Julian could only gape. "Let's end your worries over this dreams once and for all. Wait a minute."  
  
Garak left for a replicator and came back with two steaming cups. One of them, he pushed to Julian. "Shall we?"  
  
Julian looked up at Garak, whose eyes sparkled with challenge. And Julian was never the one to refuse a challenge.  
  
Defiantly he lifted the cup to his lips.  
  
Garak smiled. Simultaneously they tasted their tea.  
  
***  
  
_When the dust settled after the end of the Dominion war Julian realized that Garak was right and wrong._  
  
"Doctor! Doctor Bashir!"  
  
Julian opened his eyes to Nurse Jabara's worried expression.  
  
_Garak was wrong because his sudden but inevitable betrayal never came._  
  
"Mr. Garak brought you in, he said you fainted in the Replimat. How do you feel?"  
  
That damned lizard!  
  
_And Garak was right because Julian just didn't know when to quit._  
  
_He took his seat on the transport to Cardassia Prime._  
  
  



End file.
